Big idea #3 – Negotiation limits? From The complete negotiator, Gerard I. Nierenberg

In my previous post, from Nierenberg's book, I talked about what motivates us as negotiators, today I'm going to talk about big idea #3 "Negotiation limits" Sometimes when opposers seem to be on the run. There is a temptation to push them as hard as possible. But that one extra push may be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.

Simply stated, one of the first lessons the negotiator must learn is when to stop (pushing for more). There is a critical point in negotiation beyond which the reaction from the other side, may become uncontrolled and destructive.

So the negotiator’s aim should never be” just one more.” You must sense when you are approaching the critical point and stop short of it. All parties to negotiation should come out with some needs stratified.

This can’t happen when one of the parties is demolished.

Nierenberg goes on to summarize: Negotiation is a cooperative enterprise; common interests must be sought; negotiation is a behavioral process, not a game; in a good negotiation, everybody wins something.

In my words, negotiation is about WIN-win (no there is no mistake with the font size), both sides WIN, but it’s not an equal WIN.